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Veterans Golf Club of Victoria

July 2020 Newsletter



We are definitely living in changing times, how our life styles are facing challenging outcomes due to COVID. So please stay safe and healthy, following the guidelines of the powers to be.

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Hanging around in the wet at Southern.
Photo by Gary Finnis
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Keeping warm in the rain.
Photo by Gary Finnis

Our email with news of our day at Southern has been delayed so I took the chance to disappear over the NSW border late on the Monday after a very wet round at Southern.

We had a great field of 72 who faced the challenge of the wet conditions for a sand belt course. It was appreciated by the starters, that members arrived for their round on time with the envelopes marked accordingly. Unfortunately Southern made us cap the numbers for the day and I thank those who stood down for the round, Southern delayed our start but we must remember we are guests of these clubs.

To Captain Harold & Vice-Captain Jeff thanks for arrival and Tee time schedule. This format may have to continue in our coming days of golf.

There were some great scores even though the course was not at its best. Congratulations to our trophy winner George Giles who had 44 points, an outstanding effort, maybe the handicapper will have some say in your next outing.

It was great to see 3 news members join us - Colin Rangitonga, Peter Hameister and Phil Howe, welcome to the club enjoy your golf in our tournaments.

Now the disappointing news as you are all aware of is that the next two games have been cancelled - Eagle Ridge and Devil Bend. Please watch for information through Captain Harold and Vice-Captain Jeff as they try to arrange replacement games during August.

More importantly over the next weeks is to please stay safe and healthy adhering to the regulations as the Government have made in the community interests.

Planning for the future

Although the Committee has not been in a position to meet under the current community rules, there has been a lot of email activity planning to deal with future issues of the Club

Items of interest are:

  1. Use of electronic payments through purchase of a receiver to enable members to pay the starters by credit or debit card rather than cash.
  2. Changes to our playing schedule. Captain Harold is in constant contact with our scheduled host Clubs to give us the best chance of playing.
  3. A sub-committee completed a set of recomendations to change our constitutional arrangements, prior to the Corana Virus pandemic and it was planned to hold a Special General Meeting to put these proposals to members. This will still happen, but beforehand we need to review the proposals to allow the Club to deal constitutionally with major distractions like the Corona Virus. Of immediate concern is awarding the Club and the other annual championships which have requirements for the best 8 and 6 scores respectively. Members with constructive ideas should speak with Captain Harold

The web site

Webmaster Laurie has remained remarkedly active in preparing items of interest in the Keep in touch pages on the web site with over 100 separate items posted already. There is still lots of scope for members to contribute.

The latest items can be viewed here and an index of earlier items here

Website security

Remembering the problems many members have with passwords our web site was not designed to keep out serious hackers, but its security is certainly adequate for its purpose. Those who notice such things will have observed that the web site address is now at "https" c.f. the old "http". This implies there is a much stronger level of security of data supplied by members.




Overall winner:

George Giles (34) with 44 points won the Alf Jones Trophy

Our winners receive a $40 House of Golf voucher for their effort.

Grade winners

A Grade:  Donald Barber (15)  36 points

B Grade:  Jeff Stevens (25)  41 points

C Grade:  Colin Wiseman (36)  39 points

Nearest to the Pin:

Thanks to the joys of COVID-19 we are unable to measure the NTP values and therefor no NTPs have been awarded

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Balls down the line:

38 points  John Matthews (32)

36 points  Bill Heron (36)  Bill Dooley (26)

35 points  George Weaver (18)  Christopher Tierney (26)  Mike Hoyle (36)  Trevor McGilton (36)  Marg Holden (36)

34 points  Bernie Coyle (22)  Tom Buzza (31)

NAGA Award:

Johannes Tetteroo

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Door prize Winners:


Bill Dooley celebrated his good day at Southern by winning the raffle allowing him and three of his friends to play again at Southern.

For the last few months there has been a further major prize winner in the raffle with a Window Cleaning voucher from member Chris Thorne, but reporting of this has been overlooked. Future newsletters should overcome this ommission.
Our raffles often include further winners of miscellaneous items like bottles of red etc.


Birthday boys for July 2020

Congratulations and best wishes to our members whose birthday falls in JulyPicture

2nd  Donald MacDonald  74     Mike Hoyle  71

17th  Patrick Ryan  69

19th  David Heraud  62

20th  Rod Seach  70

30th  Roger Selwood  73

31st  Tess Killmister  72

The abusive driver

A motorcycle policeman stopped a driver for driving through a red light.

Grave not found

The driver was a real ratbag, demanded to know why he was being harassed by the Gestapo!

So the officer calmly told him of the red light violation.

The motorist instantly started a tirade, questioning the officer's ancestry, sexual orientation, etc., in rather explicit offensive terms. The tirade went on without the officer saying anything. When the officer finished writing the ticket he put an "AH" in the narrative portion of the ticket. He then handed it to the motorist for his signature.

Driver not found

The bloke signed the ticket angrily, and when presented with his copy pointed to the "AH" and demanded to know what it stood for.

The officer said, "That's so when we go to court, I'll remember that you're an ar#####le."

Two months later they're in court. The defendant had a bad driving record with a heap of points on his licence, and was in danger of losing his licence, so he hired a barrister to represent him. On the stand the officer testified to seeing the man drive through the red light.

Under cross examination the barrister for the defence asked, "Officer is this a reasonable facsimile of the ticket that you issued to my client?"

The police officer replied, "Yes, sir, that is the defendant's copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top."

"Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this ticket you don't normally make?"

"Yes, sir, in the narrative there is a red 'AH'.

"What does the "AH" stand for, officer?"

Grave not found

"Aggressive and hostile, Sir."

"Aggressive and hostile?"

"Officer, are you sure it doesn't stand for ar#####le?"

"Well, sir, you know your client better than I do."

Next event:

Devil Bend for the Ray Underwood Trophy starting at 8:00 on 03rd August


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Last updated: 22 June 2021