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Veterans Golf Club of Victoria

August 2019 Newsletter

President Report


President Donald welcomed all of us once again to Keysborough Golf Club and the stableford competition for the Ray Underwood Trophy. He asked all present to thank the club for the use of their facilities, and their generous donation of our main raffle prize. The weather turned out to be fine, if a tad cold, and the threat of rain disappeared giving us a fine sunny morning for the golf. The course was in relatively good condition given the recent rainfall, although there was some casual water in areas of the course. Fairways and greens were in good order as per usual at Keysborough. The lunchtime sandwiches were excellent and the clubhouse facilities were thoroughly enjoyed by the members. Donald expressed his thanks to Stan Odachowski, Chris Tierney and George Giles for their excellent company.  Donald expressed his thanks on behalf of the membership, to Captain Harold for the manner in which he organised today's event at such short notice after some difficulties with the original booking at Patterson River. Well done Harold!!

Under the stewardship of Daryl Edwards and John Hiscock our raffle continues to be a successful source of club funds. These funds are used directly to keep our matchday costs competitive (green fees, lunch) so please continue to support our raffle.

Number of Players / Guests:

We had a good turnout today, with 64 players involved in the competition despite there being a fairly large number of apologies. There were 5 guests today, Allen McAuliffe as a guest of Trevor McGilton, Shay McQuade guest of Jeff Taylor, Marg Holden and Beverly Jenkin who were both guests of Harold Hayes, and Peter Rodwell guest of Peter Garbellini. We wish all of our guests a very warm welcome and many years of enjoyable golf at the club should they decide to join up. All the guests received complimentary golf balls as is the custom.


There were 18 apologies this month:
Trevor Bottomley, Rex Buckeridge, Tom Buzza, Laurie Comerford, Gary Finnis, Ian Hoskins, Alex Johnson, Karl Lindberg, Robin Miller, Roland Neef, Ian Richards, Peter Ross, Roger Selwood, Declan Stephenson, Noel Valle, David Vine, Ron Wells and Colin Wiseman.

Starters today:

Donald and the members thanked Alan Millard, Jeff Stevens and Keith Aldridge who got us all away with the shotgun start, in good order. Well done guys! Please take pride in your club and always ensure that you "keep up with the group in front of you". That is the number one priority we have in terms of efficient golf. ('ready golf') Special thanks were given to both Harold Hayes and Peter Ross for their hard work in making the registration of players, and the speedy efficient dispatch of playing groups such a success. President Donald recorded his thanks to both Harold and Peter.

It is important to note that the much improved starting process relies very heavily on members being ready to play at the alloted time, especially those on carts as any delay causes a domino effect on playing groups.  Please be ready for say 7.45am if that is the time advised by the Captain.

As previously mentioned, we cannot proceed without volunteers to run these events every month, so please consider helping out as a starter, as it is a bit of fun and you will get to know so many more members of the club. Please help your Club.

Membership News:

Our next golfing event will be a stableford competition at Churchill/Waverley GC, on Monday 2nd September, 2019 for the Bernie Coyle Trophy.  Will all members please note that we return to our normal tee-off time of 7.15am (following 4 months of winter tee-times). Our Captain, Harold Hayes will advise us as to the time he would like members to turn up to ensure a smooth shotgun start at 7.15am. The booking sheet was circulated during our lunchtime. The online booking system is also available now.

President Donald also reminded us that the recent Winter Classic event at Eagle Ridge GC was won by the team consisting of Donnie Barber, Noel Valle, Warren Stahl and Chris McGeorge.

Donald was delighted to welcome the lady golfers who were present today and he reiterated that all new lady members were very welcome at the Club. Members of the Committee are reaching out to various groups to encourage more participation of lady members as we seek to increase our overall membership.
He asks that members assist this initiative by inviting wives, partners and friends along as guests in the coming months.

CoM Business:

No meeting in August. Next CoM meeting is on Sept 2nd.

Special Achievements:

In the past month or so these achievements were noted;

  • Bernie Coyle won both 'C' grade and the overall comp on July 20th at Drouin GC. He had a total of 41pts off a handicap of 22. By the way this score was registered using the 'black' markers on a par 73 course. Well done Bernie!
  • Don Barrett won the Wednesday comp at Brighton GC with a stableford score of 39pts. Congratulations Don!
  • Our handicapper, Ray Desmond had a winning score of +5 at a recent Brighton GC. Terrific golf Ray!

We look forward to more success on the golf course in the coming weeks. Go Vets!

Congratulations to all our Vets winners.
Thanks go to all those who contributed the information.

Vets Web Site :

Our Webmaster, Laurie Comerford is on holiday at the moment. The website continues to underpin the smooth operation of our great Club.  Any ideas or queries?  Please contact Laurie by email .

Members are advised that they can contact all committee members with an email address in the format:
Emails sent to these addresses are automatically forwarded to the relevant Committee member's private email address.

As an example and email addressed to:
will go to Jeff Taylor.

Question time :

There being no member's questions, Donald then handed over to our Captain, Harold Hayes.



Overall winner:

Christopher Tierney (30) with 42 points won the Ray Underwood Trophy

Our winners receive a $40 House of Golf voucher for their effort.

Grade winners

A Grade:  Donald Barber (14)  38 points

B Grade:  Lindsay Quennell (28)  38 points

C Grade:  Neil Wilson (32)  37 points

Nearest to the Pin:

3rd hole: John Currie  8th hole: Allan Logan

12th hole: Donald Barrett  15th hole: Ray Underwood

Captain joke image not yet available

Need we say more

Balls down the line:

37 points  Peter Garbellini (16)  Donald Harrowell (24)

34 points  John Molloy (22)  David Heraud (31)  Allan Logan (18)  Jeff Stevens (24)  Bruce Keenan (25)  Shay McQuade (25)  Peter Sloan (30)  Tony Villani (30)

NAGA Award:

Bill Frey

Naga image not yet available

Door prize Winners:


Beverly Jenkin celebrated her good day at Keysborough by winning the raffle allowing her and three of her friends to play again at Keysborough.
It should be noted she drew her own name in the raffle and had a nearest-the-pin. 
With sufficient ingenuity anything will do.


Birthday boys for August 2019

Congratulations and best wishes to our members whose birthday falls in AugustPicture

4th  Malcolm Turner  72

11th  Craig Fitchet  58

15th  Peter Hameister  77

24th  Beverly Jenkin  73

30th  Jim Collins  73

31st  Graham Lee  62

From a Scottish Golf Club ablutions block:

The Mechanics Workshop - Tools manual


A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh sh--!'

A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictale motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.


Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.

A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.


A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside.

A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.

Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.

A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

A tool used to make hoses too short.


Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund cheques, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.


(A personal favorite!!) Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling 'Son of a BITCH!' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.

Next event:

Churchill/Waverley for the Bernie Coyle Trophy starting at 7:15 on 02nd September

 Harold Hayes ☎ 03 9570 4759 or 0408 558 260 Noel Manning ☎ 03 9889 0588 or 0408 638 978 Tony Villani ☎ 03 9562 0096 or 0437 336 001

Lang Lang for the Ken Gangell Trophy starting at 8:00 on 30th September

 Philip Horsburgh ☎ 0402 076 916 Chris Macgeorge ☎ 03 5978 6063 or 0409 403 163 Jeff Stevens ☎ 0408 222 128

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Last updated: 23 July 2021